Now that Thanksgiving is over, I have decided that something must be done for Brooke. She is trying to put her confusion about Erin and her doubts about Morgan into the past, but I am not certain that is wise. Will this not come back to haunt them in the future?
I was at first unsure whether or not my uncertainty sprang from my own doubts, or whether it was a genuine concern. So I was on my way to speak to Danit, but instead I received advice from another senior when Lubos came to greet me.
“I have been looking for you,” he said, smiling at me. “You have been very busy lately, I hear.”
“I have, indeed! But it has been fascinating work, and I am grateful for it.” I hesitated, then I said, “I hope your work also prospers, and that your charges are well.”
He laughed. “They are, including Freya, whose welfare interests you most of all, I am sure. She was invited to Thanksgiving with Ryan and his family, but elected to spend it with her mother and her students as usual.”
I frowned. “I hope that does not indicate some tension between them.”
“No, they fare quite well together. They plan to spend Christmas with his family.” He angled his head, looking at me. “Is there something that is troubling you, my brother?”
“In fact, there is,” I told him. “I was going to ask Danit for her advice, but yours would also be appreciated. Will you talk with me a moment?”
He gestured with one wing. “My time is yours.”
So I told him all that had happened, how Brooke and Morgan have been separated, how they were doing well, until doubts began to fill Brooke. I told him about the encounter between Brooke and Erin and the awkwardness that followed. I told him that Brooke feels some remorse about what happened, but also some curiosity about and gratitude for the affection Erin offered. “Now that lies between them, though Morgan knows nothing about it. Should it be allowed to fade, or should it come out into the light?”
Lubos considered the problem for a long moment. “I have learned,” he said slowly, “that most often it is light and truth that serve a relationship best. The question, however, is how should it come into the light, and what must happen when it does. Does Brooke have feelings for this Erin, or is the option she presents only an easier path in comparison to this relationship that means more?”
“The latter, I think,” I said. “She considers Erin to be a good friend, but before Erin confessed her feelings, she never considered turning her affections from Morgan.”
“Is she considering it now?”
“No,” I said, thinking back over all of Brooke’s musings on the problem. She has not considered it, except maybe for an instant, and always she rejected the thought immediately. “Never seriously.”
“Be certain of this, Asa’el,” Lubos cautioned me. “Sometimes an idle thought is just that, but if it keeps coming back, there may be some substance to it.”
I rose. “Will you come with me, and see for yourself?”
He flicked his wings, smiling. “Of course. It will be a pleasure to see you work.”
He is too kind to me, really.
I led the way down to the Garden, to where Brooke was lingering in the back yard of Morgan’s parents’ house, sipping coffee and shivering a bit, but unwilling to go back inside yet. She was admiring the morning light, and thinking about Morgan.
“Ah,” Lubos said, looking at her. He lifted one wing and, glancing at me for permission, wrapped it around Brooke. “I see what you mean. It is her doubt, then, that is the problem, and not the temptation of another.”
That he saw this so quickly was not surprising at all; he is one of the best.
“You truly do not want any other but your own, do you?” he murmured to Brooke, who shivered again. “But you fear that she will not remain your own. If it was possible for you to look away from her, even for a moment, it is possible that she will turn away from you.”
The door behind Brooke opened, and Morgan poked her head out. “Brooke, what are you doing, it’s freezing out here!”
Brooke glanced over her shoulder and smiled with love and sadness. “It’s beautiful out here. Wanna come keep me warm?”
“Ha!” Morgan said. “Nice try. Why don’t you come in and I’ll warm you up?” She waggled her eyebrows at Brooke, making her laugh.
“You should have more faith in your beloved,” Lubos murmured, and gave her a nudge toward the door.
As the two of them went inside together, Lubos turned to me. “Encourage her to tell the truth,” he said. “Fears and doubts will only grow if they are allowed to remain in the shadows. In any case, Morgan cannot help Brooke lose her fear if she does not know about it.”
This seemed like wisdom to me, and so that is exactly what I intend to do. It will not be easy to do—telling the truth about a temptation outside of their relationship may bring about the very break that Brooke fears most. But if Morgan can understand that Brooke never intended or even wished to leave her, then the confession may very well bring them closer together.
I will hope for this result, and that my work may soon bear some of the same wisdom and grace that Lubos brings to his. Thank you, my brother, for your assistance. I hope that I may use it well.