Well. I have been released, though I am no wiser now than I was in my restriction.
Zezette and Danit came to see me just now, and I could read neither of them at all. Zezette apologized for keeping me so close and told me that I was free to go.
I was surprised. “Are there to be no consequences, then?” I had expected them—I still do, in fact. “I know what I did was wrong.”
For a moment, Zezette did not answer me. “What you did,” she said finally, “is beyond the experience of your seniors. Frankly, Asa’el, you should not have been able to do what you did—but you did. We have been considering what the ramifications of this may be, but we are no closer to answers than we were when we began. The only thing on which we agree is that it is unfair to deprive your charges of your guidance for so long without good reason. So we wish for you to return to work, and when we have made a decision, you will be told.”
And that was that. I did not feel that I had the right to ask any questions, but I have many. What did she mean, what I had done was beyond their experience? I have heard stories of angels embodying humans in time of emergency—why should there be stories if it was impossible? And of course it is only natural to assume that it is forbidden. It was at least something serious enough that they should restrict me to heaven for a time, but why then would they release me so easily? If I am not to be kept from my charges—not even Freya, for they said nothing about staying away from her—then what else could they do to me?
I have tried to speak to Danit, but she will not see me. None of our seniors are available, in fact, which worries me. I saw Lubos very briefly, and he did not seem angry with me, thankfully, but he too did not have the time to speak. As for the rest of my brothers and sisters, they are keeping a slight distance from me, looking at me with some puzzlement and awe. I understand, of course, but I wish it were not so.
I did not mean to do anything wrong, or to do something that would set me apart. I would never wish that. All I wanted was to protect her.