“Work” as the humans see it is a strange concept. They keep it separate from themselves, for one thing—with most of them, “work” is a place apart from their homes, and the activities that they do there are restricted to that place. For another thing, they frequently do not enjoy the work that they have volunteered to do—they do it only to have the money that is necessary for survival. Most interesting, at least in my opinion, are the relationships they form with people they “work” with. They can spend years in close proximity with these people, and on the surface they may seem to be friends, and yet there is no real connection between them. It is as if everything about this “work” encourages boundaries and restrictions in their spirits.
Hannah is lucky in her workplace—she has found a place where she enjoys the work that she does, work that feeds her spirit as well as her body. But she, too, is subject to the difficulties that come with work. And now that she has found more joy in life outside of her work, she is having trouble restructuring her time into a suitable balance. Or, rather, she is having trouble persuading others to help her with this.
“I’ve asked Dr. Bentley to schedule me earlier in the day so I can have evenings off,” Hannah told Jack over dinner today—the first dinner they’ve had together in a week, and that only because Jack waited to eat until Hannah came home. Lily was already in bed. “I’ve asked her more than once. But she just won’t listen to me.”
“Well, I imagine it’s hard to change the schedule around,” Jack said.
“Not that hard. I’ve talked to the other fellows in the department and they’re perfectly willing to take the evening shifts. But Dr. Bentley has got this idea in her head that new doctors have to ‘pay their dues’—she’s got me on two night shifts next week! Two! And when I pointed that out to her today, she said, ‘Oh, but that leaves the whole day free for you’—hello! We are all doctors, we know how important sleep is!”
Jack took her hand and squeezed it. “It’s okay, Hannah. Lily and I understand. Hell, if anyone understands how important your work is, we do.”
Hannah sighed and shook her head. “But you are important, too,” she said, covering his hand with her own. “And I don’t ever want Lily to think that she doesn’t mean as much to me as my work does. I want her to see me as a part of her life.”
Jack smiled at this. “I promise you, she does. Look, go talk to Dr. Bentley one more time, and tell her everything that you’re telling me. And if that doesn’t work, then you can go up to her supervisor, can’t you?”
Hannah grimaced. “She’ll hate me if I go over her head like that.”
“Maybe, but it’s your right to do that if she isn’t helping you the way she should. It’s one thing to not have the staff to give everyone the schedule they want, and a whole other thing to make them work schedules according to what she thinks is right and not what you want.”
He was right, and Hannah knew this, but still she hesitated. It took me a while to understand why—she was worried that Jack’s plan, if she put it into action, would offend her senior, and that the other woman would then use her power over Hannah to make her life miserable. Indeed, power seems to be a major concern at “work”—who has authority, who doesn’t, and what people without power can do to improve their lot…why can’t they all work together toward the same goal? Yes, sometimes the right to make decisions needs to be given to one and not all, but that does not make that person any better than those who put those decisions into actions.
It is all very strange. At least it seems to show Jack and Hannah how much they mean to one another. And there are no such power plays between them—they talk regularly now about Lily, about how they want to raise her together. It is quite lovely to see.
Time is so very precious, and it is good that Hannah knows that. I only hope that she will have the chance to use it as she wishes.